CALIFORNIA, USA—Students who have boarded the left’s “gun control” train have now formally demanded that “Trump” repeal the Second Amendment, as well as “parts of the First and the Third.”

The children told Newsquips through a spokeschild they chose based on their “chill new piercings” — that they wish to be viewed as grown adults. They are demanding to be taken seriously by shouting repeatedly, “We want safety! And we aint-a-gonna mafety!”, and stomping their feet to what they described as “some pimp tight beats” by artists Baie Be Killinpigs and Mofo F’er Killa.

“Like the Second Amendment is obviously not like very important since they listed it like second, after the First Amendment, right” said one student spokeschild. “So like duh, unlike it,” she continued.

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Asked what parts of the First and Third they demand to be repealed by “Trump,” the student spokeschild admitted she didn’t really know what the First and Third Amendments actually said, but said she’d heard a lot about it from “a dude” who teaches her Social Justice class in school. “But we like don’t like, like, free speech from people who are all like ‘guns’ and are all like about their ‘rights’ and like ‘gun rights’ and stuff like that right? And like army soldiers should be used for like peace stuff, and like stopping gun rights people from leaving their houses right? Know what I mean.”

Newquips left the interview before the students finished talking, so we cannot accurately report on the rest of their demands.